Produced by David Widger
THE CONFESSIONS OF JEAN JACQUES ROUSSEAU
(In 12 books)
Privately Printed for the Members of the Aldus Society
London, 1903
With this book begins the work of darkness, in which I have for the lasteight years been enveloped, though it has not by any means been possiblefor me to penetrate the dreadful obscurity. In the abyss of evil intowhich I am plunged, I feel the blows reach me, without perceiving thehand by which they are directed or the means it employs. Shame andmisfortune seem of themselves to fall upon me. When in the affliction ofmy heart I suffer a groan to escape me, I have the appearance of a manwho complains without reason, and the authors of my ruin have theinconceivable art of rendering the public unknown to itself, or withoutits perceiving the effects of it, accomplice in their conspiracy.Therefore, in my narrative of circumstances relative to myself, of thetreatment I have received, and all that has happened to me, I shall notbe able to indicate the hand by which the whole has been directed, norassign the causes, while I state the effect. The primitive causes areall given in the preceding books; and everything in which I aminterested, and all the secret motives pointed out. But it is impossiblefor me to explain, even by conjecture, that in which the different causesare combined to operate the strange events of my life. If amongst myreaders one even of them should be generous enough to wish to examine themystery to the bottom, and discover the truth, let him carefully readover a second time the three preceding books, afterwards at each fact heshall find stated in the books which follow, let him gain suchinformation as is within his reach, and go back from intrigue tointrigue, and from agent to agent, until he comes to the first mover ofall. I know where his researches will terminate; but in the meantime Ilose myself in the crooked and obscure subterraneous path through whichhis steps must be directed.
During my stay at Yverdon, I became acquainted with all the family of myfriend Roguin, and amongst others with his niece, Madam Boy de la Tour,and her daughters, whose father, as I think I have already observed,I formerly knew at Lyons. She was at Yverdon, upon a visit to her uncleand his sister; her eldest daughter, about fifteen years of age,delighted me by her fine understanding and excellent disposition.I conceived the most tender friendship for the mother and the daughter.The latter was destined by M. Rougin to the colonel, his nephew, a manalready verging towards the decline of life, and who showed me marks ofgreat esteem and affection; but although the heart of the uncle was setupon this marriage, which was much wished for by the nephew also, and Iwas greatly desirous to promote the satisfaction of both, the greatdisproportion of age, and the extreme repugnancy of the young lady, mademe join with the mother in postponing the ceremony, and the affair was atlength broken off. The colonel has since married Mademoiselle Dillan,his relation, beautiful, and amiable as my heart could wish, and who hasmade him the happiest of husbands and fathers. However, M. Rougin hasnot yet forgotten my opposition to his wishes. My consolation is in thecertainty of having discharged to him, and his family, the duty of themost pure friendship, which does not always consist in being agreeable,but in advising for the best.
I did not remain long in doubt about the reception which awaited me atGeneva, had I chosen to return to that city. My book was burned there,and on the 18th of June, nine days after an order to arrest me had beengi